Monday, July 23, 2018

Real barriers against fake ones

I feel like being on the verge to raise a big fence: one of those impenetrable fences, made to last forever, that decorate the acres of land around each country house, here in Steiermark. I can hardly imagine the amount of work and dedication necessary to chop and clean the trees, prepare each single rod with the same length, make the wicker ropes and initiate a thatch-work that doesn't stand on its own until it's completely finished. That's a kind of allegory of my daily work.
So, after two years spent in Austria, suddenly something happened that made my professional life change again. From night to day, I had to wear some other's dresses, that in some extent I was not prepared to be given, not in the way it happened. And immediately after I realized that a new gear shift was necessary to give a meaning to all my efforts. I got more responsibilities, ownership and an endless list of advice, complaints, claims, in some cases even ingenuous and less ingenuous blackmail that are really putting myself on trial.
After a couple of months I'm beginning to adjust my behavior and be less extrovert, less emphatic, more careful to every single word pronounced by my former mates. I'm building, in other words, walls around me, as there seem no other way to better organize my life.

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